Polymorphous Perverse and Proud!

Frued used the term “polymorphous perversity” to describe an infantile ability to derive pleasure from non-normative (i.e., non-genital) sexual practices or behaviors. A child is supposed to “learn,” I guess(?), that sexual pleasure is supposed to come only from the genitals.

This stance has been challenged by Deleuze and Guatarri in The Anti-Oedipus, arguing that what Freud termed polymorphous perversity (and therefore incomplete or deviant) is in actuality a completely free slate, a free area of play of signifiers. It transcends distinction and difference, which would eventually compartmentalize sensation—self, object/fetish, genitals, other body parts.

Judith Butler has also criticized the socialization of the individual subject to in effect this free sense of their body as a whole, assigning specific roles to certain parts or areas. For example, if some said, “Feel this!,” you would most likely stick out your hand to touch, no? Yes, the hands and fingertips have more receptors, but most of your skin all over your body would feel the general sensation. Granted, even I don’t test the roughness of sandpaper or the smoothness of silk with my elbow or anything, but I would still feel it.

At any rate, I am writing this not as an analytical piece about past conceptions of polymorphous perversity. I am writing this because I fit the definition. Oh, don’t think that I have not experienced erotic pleasure from the more traditional body parts that one would think to be the origins of a man’s sexual pleasure. It also doesn’t mean that a touch will automatically make me horny. However, a simple touch in the right place in the right way can give me personally some sensation that is akin to erotic pleasure.

The first time I had sex with Trey, I did not come, at least not in the obvious sense. However, he caressed my body all over in a way that I orgasmed with my whole body. And after that intense rush of endorphins, I felt tired. Yep! I came & then felt sleepy! And all without any penetration and with my bodily fluids intact.

I guess I am writing this because I think that it is a gift, not a perversion, that I have sensitive nipples, that a gentle caress of my back can make me swoon, or that butterfly kisses along my jawline below my ears could make my eyes roll back into my head. These are just a few examples. I firmly believe that the fact that I am comfortable with my entire body and its possibilities for pleasure are one of the reasons that I identify as bisexual. The tender hand or gentle lips that give that touch have no gender. However, I must also admit that, for me, the touch of someone to whom I am emotionally attracted increases the physical reaction I have.

I guess the issue for me is that, as in being bisexual, being able to feel pleasure at the touch of someone you care about, and not just a nice kiss or a stroke on the genitals (not that those are bad, mind you!), is something that I cherish and something that is often misunderstood by people who want clear boundaries. I deny and defy those boundaries. Of this, I am proud!