Earlier, I described how I met Ivan in S____ C______. My relationship with Ivan didn’t last quite as long as some other relationships I have had, but it was filled with some of the most wonderful moments I have ever experienced. I have said several times that I am a romantic at heart, and Ivan was able to exploit that as well as anyone. I may have been the one studying languages, but he sure had a way with words…and more. He told me how erotic he found the noise made by a belt being undone and pulled off. I must admit that I now find that sound erotic too.
Although I had lost my MOTSS virginity with Matt, Ivan was able to “make loving fun” in ways that I had never thought of and in some ways I had indeed only dreamed of previously. He was romantic and sweet and passionate. I do miss having someone like that. We were both busy with our academic careers, but we always seemed to find quality time for just us. We also were good to compromise and accommodate each other. He bought me tickets for a Parliament-Funkadelic concert, although they’re not his favorite, and he went with me. I asked him why he did that, and he said that it was to be with me and to see me enjoy myself. Although he may not have loved the show quite like I did, I certainly enjoyed it even more having him there.
I hate dressing up, but I got done up in what for me passed for finery when he wanted to go to a fancy dinner and then to the symphony. When I got ready, he said, “That’s great! You look hot, but there’s one thing I’d like to change IF it’s all right with you.” I wasn’t sure, but I saw him grin, so I said, “OK.” He told me to close my eyes, and he took off the old tie I had on, and he fixed me up in a new one—that tie of his that had stimulated our first discussion of dating. After I saw what he had done, I laughed, and he pulled on that tie to bring me into an embrace and kiss that were so deep, soft, and passionate that I still feel a little weak in the knees remembering it. It was the kind of kiss that epic poems spring from. It was the kind of kiss that not only stirred the body but breathed new vitality into the heart and soul. Although I did not initiate it, participating in that kiss and embrace is still one of my proudest and happiest moments.
Ivan & I each found spots on the other’s body that we hadn’t known were erogenous zones previously (not at that precise moment, mind you!, but at other times: I got caught up in reverie and in my sense memories there). No one has ever kissed my neck since Ivan in a way that…well, in that way. We connected so powerfully in a sexual way that in retrospect I find it uncanny. We always seemed to share the same mood—romantically playful, hornily furious, hours spent cuddling and caressing without penetration, just sitting in each other’s presence with an occasional touch. The curve from his perfectly-shaped ass to the small of his back was a natural beauty unmatched in this hemisphere. I would’ve designated it a natural wonder of the world for the feeling it inspired in me. I often kissed that small of his back just to hear the pleasured groan he would give every time I did so. The tenderness of his caresses was indescribably, transcendently breathtaking, regardless of whether he used his tender hands, his nimble tongue, or any other part of his most sturdy but gentle flesh. His eyes were almost always fully open and maintaining contact with my eyes in the act of lovemaking. It didn’t matter who was top or bottom. Those eyes displayed such caring, such desire, such humor, such passion, such warmth, such joy. Hey, I told you I was a romantic; I am also a complete sucker. ;) I felt so comfortable being desired and desiring him. That was new to me: no doubts, no thoughts of guilt, no wondering what my folks might say. I was always in the moment with Ivan, & I loved those moments!