Monoliths

Obviously, I write this blog about my experiences as a bisexual man. Obviously, my personal experiences are not everyone’s. Then, again, neither is the way I experience sexuality. I write about my bisexuality, and, of course, other people may experience different feelings. That dear friend who came out to me recently does not currently identify with a sexual attraction to MOTSS, but ze does embrace the emotional, intellectual, and spiritual attractions ze feels. I think that it’s truly rare that any 2 people completely match in their sexuality, regardless of their orientations. I am bisexual, and I express it and feel it in a certain way. If you feel something similar, great! If not, that’s fine. I respect your feeling and expression of your sexuality.

Sexuality is so often treated as some monolithic thing. This seems to be especially true of male sexuality. Male sexuality is so often treated as something fixed, immutable and consistent. Female sexuality is often treated as somehow inherently fluid and playful: it is almost treated as something non-serious. These reifications of sexuality anger me. Not only do they distort whole groups, they disallow for individual variance. I say that we must resist being interpellated into a system that tries to make us fit into a box. Each of us has our own way of being, feeling, and expressing our attractions—however simple or complicated those attractions may be. We should celebrate diversity in the truest sense of the word, by not limiting ourselves or others by narrowing, totalizing expectations, despite the labels we might choose for ourselves.